BABIES WITH RABIES GO TO HADES

So this is something that I don't understand. Perhaps someone can provide an explanation for this phenomenon. I've flown literally 100s of flights the past 6 years for business and so have dealt with my share of noisy flights. Unfortunately, last week I experienced the worst in recent and long-term memory. My UAL flight from Kona, HI (KOA) to San Francisco, CA (SFO) had the highest number of babies and toddlers in the history of humankind.

In my row, there were 2 such devil children and they would scream at the top of their lungs during random times during the flight. The parents were unattentive and would let the child throw a tantrum, eventually giving the child a DVD player running Barney the Dinosaur to calm him/her down (children are ambiguous to me in terms of their gender). At one point, said child was crawling along the floor (ew!) and grabbed a teenaged girl's legs in the row in front of her. Why someone would let their child crawl along the knappy-carpeted peanut crumb-riddled floor of an aging 767 is beyond my comprehension.

OK, but here's the thing that REALLY confused me. Why were these people spending all this money to take unruly children to a relaxing paradise like Hawaii? Hawaii is to have fun, yes, but it is also to relax. With children in the age condition I saw them in, there's no way either of these can take place. Yes, if they were in grammar school or something, snorkeling and beach activities would be fine, but these children were pre-pre-school aged and out-of-control. Not only this, but some were infants and not able to even feed themselves!

Come on people! Leave your child with grandma and grandpa! And Airbus+Boeing, please design an aircraft with a soundproof section for the screaming children. Or, Bose, please make your Noise Cancelling headphones also Baby-Cancelling. Chemical companies, please put Valium into a discreet spray bottle (like Binaca) so that I can secretly spray monster children on my way down the aisle. Then I could get some peace.